Sad Beautiful Tragic
by rumbleroarsbutt
Summary: A collection of one-shots based on songs from Taylor Swift's new album 'Red'. *update* 'I Almost Do' And when her phone rings for probably the eleventh time she realises why she can't just pick up the phone and talk to him - she doesn't want to say goodbye to him again and suffer all that pain.
1. Treacherous

**All spelling mistakes or grammatical errors are my own, I only proofread this once. This is partly based on some of the spoilers for 'Glease' but most of it is just my wishful thinking. I don't own glee what-so-ever.**

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Grease is good, really good; and she's so so proud of him. She's proud of him for finding some direction on his own but at the same time it hurts. They were supposed to find his dream together and for the longest time he was completely lost, then the moment she breaks up with him he finds his way. Maybe she was the problem all along. The opening chords to 'You're The One That I Want' swirl around the packed-out auditorium and her stomach turns with unease. The people on the stage were good, but not as good as she and Finn were. Even though they never really got to finish the song. Her imagination spirals off and she can see herself in Finn's arms being spun around and around until it becomes too much and she has to escape from the suffocating confines of the auditorium. Her stupid black heels click-clack along the filthy floor until she finally slumps against a locker, her locker. She kicks the shoes off, feeling inadequate and childish, and wishes she could just be back in high school with her knee socks and animal sweaters and Finn.

_Put your lips close to mine  
__As long as they don't touch  
__Out of focus, eye to eye  
__Till the gravity's too much_

Heavy footsteps thunder from down the hallway and she cowers into the hard metal of the locker in an attempt to hide her tear-stained face. The figure comes to a halt in front of her and she risks a peak through her fingers and she should have know. His face is soft and kind and it looks like he's been crying too since his eyes are all red and puffy. Slowly he lowers his body to the ground beside her and wraps his arms around her in a big, safe hug and she thinks that maybe she'll be ok. After a few seconds she pulls away but only just enough to look into his warm cinnamon eyes. She's staring at him intensely and he can feel his heart racing and god, he just really wants to kiss her and her soft pink lips; but instead he settles for wiping away some of her tears. They stay like that for a while, in each other's embrace, but then she whispers an 'I love you' so soft he's not even sure it's real but then her lips are moving against his and it is so real.

_And I'll do anything you say  
__If you say it with your hands  
__And I'd be smart to walk away  
__But you're quicksand_

His hands slip to her upper thigh and he's sucking so hard on her neck that she knows she'll get a hickey but she doesn't care because he just feels so good. And she would do anything for him, absolutely anything. Because he's Finn and really, he's it for her, no one can compare - not Brody, not Jesse, not Noah, not anyone. Her skin feels soft and warm and welcoming and he's missed her so, so much. He know's they're going to have to talk about this later and figure out what the hell they're doing, they did just break up after all. She's just so perfect though and he wants her, he wants all of her and he loves her and he doesn't ever want to let her go; because no matter what, she'll always be it for him.

_This slope is treacherous  
__This path is reckless  
__This slope is treacherous  
__An like it_

They manage to make it onto their feet but Rachel's shirt has already been thrown off to the side somewhere and her hands are dipping in and out of his boxer shorts and now he really knows they shouldn't be doing this. Her body is aching for him and she doesn't want to stop, she doesn't care about the consequences all that matters is her and Finn and their love. He grabs her butt and hoists her up, her long legs wrapping themselves around his hips and then they're stumbling into that small janitor's closet that had become so familiar to them during senior year. His breath is hot against her neck and a deep moan escapes his throat.  
"I love you so much, Rach"  
"Show me"

_I can't decide if it's a choice  
__Getting swept away  
__I hear the sound of my own voice  
__Asking you to stay  
__And all we are is skin and bone trained to get along  
__Forever going with the flow but you're friction_

He plunges into her and all he can think about is how they got to where they are now, how she captivated him from the beginning and how he fell helplessly in love with her. He remembers every moment they ever shared together and he honestly can't figure out how they got so messed up and he thinks it mostly his fault because she's so perfect and he's just... not. As her orgasm rattles through her body she screams his name and she loves him so so much and she's missed him more than she thought. Once they come down from their climaxes his rough voice asks for her stay and complies, falling into his arms and just breathing in the smell of home.

_This slope is Treacherous  
__This path is reckless  
__This slope is Treacherous  
__I I I like it_

They slowly sneak out of the closet only to find a very suspicious looking Kurt and they both know they'll be getting a lecture later that night. Kurt informs them that the musical finished like, ten minutes ago, and everyone was looking for them. They both flush a bright crimson and Finn quickly runs off murmuring something about the cast. Kurt raises his eyebrows at her and she just shakes her head because even she doesn't know what happened and she really isn't ready to talk about it yet. She doesn't utter a single word on the drive home and walks straight up to her old bedroom, collapsing onto her extensive collection of stuffed animals.

_Two headlights shine through the sleepless night  
__And I will get you get you alone  
__Your name has echoed through my mind  
__And I just think you should think you should know  
__That nothing safe is worth the drive  
__And I will follow you follow you home, follow you follow you home_

The storm broke out about half an hour ago and he'd hoped it would've passed by now but he's straining to see what's in front him with the car headlights on the highest and the windscreen wipers moving back and forth at an impossible rate. But it's all worth it, to see her. She's lying in her bed trying to get some sleep but his name just keeps creeping up on her and she keeps recalling that night's events - the feeling of his body pressed against hers, joined in the deepest connection possible, skin to skin, no barriers. The sound of the door bell rings throughout the home and she makes sure to grab her Daddy's baseball bat before going to answer the door, her dads were out on a business trip and it was two in morning. Cautiously the door creaks open and he's met with the face of the tired-looking brunette that will always have his heart. A soft sigh escapes her lips and he's not sure if it's sad or angry or happy or whatever but she lets him in anyway. His clothes are soaked from waiting outside and she tells him how stupid he is for coming to see her in the middle of a storm in the middle of the night but throws him one of his old McKinley shirts that she must have stolen from him and a pair of boxers that could only have belonged to one of her dads. They end up cuddling on her bed, cradling steamy hot chocolates and begin to discuss what went down in that janitor's closet.

_This hope is Treacherous  
__This day dream is dangerous  
__This hope is Treacherous  
__I I I , I I I, I I I_

They talk and talk and for the first time things seem to be looking up for them and maybe this is it, maybe they'll finally get to be together. Finally. But it's all just naive, delusional hope because the next morning she has to fly back to New York and NYADA and Brody and Finn stays in Lima because he has to look after the Glee Club like he said he would and he's just not ready to be going to New York yet because he's still lost and the timing just isn't right. They talk on the phone every night and they're both not really sure what it is because none of them have put a label on it, like they're not officially dating and they're not engaged again but they're certainly a lot more than friends. She feels happy, happier than she has been in a long time when one night Finn pretty much screams into her ear that he's been accepted into NYU and he wants to become a teacher because he wants to inspire people and help them find their dreams just like Mr Schue did for him and her heart swells with pride and joy and everything feels right. A week later though she starts feeling sick and she finds her head hanging over the shiny porcelain toilet bowl time after time again until Kurt makes her go to the doctor and things change forever.

_Two headlights shine through the sleepless night  
__And I will get you get you alone  
__Your name has echoed through my mind  
__And I just think you should think you should know_

She didn't tell Finn she was coming, let alone the reason why. It's chilly and she can feel the wind right through her bright red trench coat. He opens the door and at first he's confused but then a smile spreads across his face and she tries her best to return that smile but she just can't. Everything is bubbling up inside her. She can't do this. He hangs up her coat and they go up to his room with hot chocolates, just like that night at her house almost three months ago. He asks her why she's here because he knows her and he knows something's up. When she doesn't reply straight away he grabs her small body and holds it against his in a reassuring hug.  
"You know you can tell me anything"  
Her breath hitches for just a second then she lets out a little cough. She turns her head and looks him straight in the eye and she's honestly starting to scare him a little because whatever this is, it must be super serious.  
"I'm pregnant"

_That nothing safe is worth the drive  
__And I will follow you follow you home  
__I'll follow you follow you home  
__I'll follow you follow you home  
__I'll follow you follow you home_

He remembers the day she told him, how his whole world just stopped and then his heart began to fill with joy because he was going to be a dad. Sure, he was scared to death but he had to be strong for Rach and he really did like the idea of starting a family with her. That was a year ago now and things have been pretty crazy, he started at NYU in the fall and he's been loving it even though the studying can be really boring and hard. He's been working extra hard so he might be able to graduate a year earlier because the sooner he starts working, the better. The warehouse apartment thing Rachel and Kurt going on before he came here has actually worked out really well since all they had to do was put up a few curtains to make a nursery for Chris and even with Blaine there it isn't too over-crowded. It turns out roommates can come in handy when you have a new born baby and you're still in school. Rachel's going to be starting back at NYADA next semester and she's really lucky they let her take this one off and didn't kick her out. It's probably because she's so talented. She doesn't want to get ahead of herself because whenever she does things always go bad but finally, finally after all this time things seem to be good and staying good. And she's so glad she and Finn made love that night a McKinley, even though it resulted in an unplanned pregnancy. She figures you have to get it wrong a few times to get it right, and she wouldn't change all those wrongs they made in the past because she knows they'll make more in the future and she knows they make them what the are today. And she likes that.

_This slope is Treacherous  
__I I I like it_

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**Wow, I haven't written a story in what seems like forever! Anyway this was just a quick little one-shot I whipped up purely because I was bored of studying science and I have to do a creative piece for English. This counts as practice, right? I hope you all enjoyed this quick little story and any reviews are welcome, especially constructive criticism (I don't mind if you're little harsh).  
**

**Until next time, Sliguu x**


	2. I Almost Do

**Disclaimer: If I owned Glee I would be writing the show not writing fanfiction  
Any and all mistakes are mine... sorry**

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_I bet this time of night you're still up  
__I bet you're tired from a long, hard week  
__I bet you're sitting in your chair by the window, looking out at the city  
__And I bet sometimes you wonder about me_

It's 2 o'clock in the morning and he's so tired but he just can't sleep and his mind just keeps going back to her. He's tried not to think about Rachel ever since their most recent break-up with the whole no contact thing they agreed on, and he's been doing a pretty good job since running Glee Club and working at the tire shop keep him busy most of the time. But it's times like this when he just can't stop thinking about her. He wonders how she's doing in New York, like obviously she's doing amazing because, well, she's Rachel and she was born to go to NYADA and be on the Broadway sage and all but it's not that kind of thing he wonders about. The last time he saw her she looked so different and so un-Rachel-Berry-like and sure she looked hot as ever but the 6-inch heels and the heavy eyeliner just wasn't her. So he wonders if she actually likes how she's changed and he wonders if he'll ever see those adorable animal sweaters again. Mostly though, he wonders if she ever wonders about him. He spends so much time with her on his mind it isn't possible for her to not think about him sometimes. He imagines her sitting in a plush designer armchair that Kurt probably bought, looking out onto the city from her unusual but incredibly inviting warehouse apartment and he wishes he could be there too, sitting beside her. Instead he's lying in his bed at his parent's house in Lima. Fuck.

_And I just want to tell you  
__It takes everything in me not to call you  
__And I wish I could run to you  
__And I hope you know that  
__Every time I don't,  
__I almost do, I almost do_

She can't tell you how many times she finds herself just staring at her phone, scrolling down her contacts list until she reaches his name and feeling the anxious butterflies flutter in her stomach. No matter how many times she calls him, she just can't bring herself to speak; she sits there and relishes the sound of his voice calling her name for a few seconds until the line goes dead. It's sad, really and she's been trying so so hard to keep their promise of no contact and she's just thrown herself into her studies at NYADA. Kurt starts to get a little worried and tries setting her up with some new amazing guy but she just waves him off because no one could ever compare to her Finn, even if he isn't there right now. She wishes he was there though, and she wishes she could just fall into the warmth of his strong arms but she's too stubborn to admit that to herself and she's too scared to talk things out with him.

He lets out a huff and rubs some of the grease off his nose with the back of his hand, no matter how hard he works he's never really going to be free of her because even here in the garage he has memories of being with Rachel. Flashbacks to senior year float through his mind and he must've spaced out because the next thing he knows a customer is yelling for his attention and he has to wipe the tears from his eyes. He remembers a time when everything was so much more simple and he could just run to Rachel's house if he ever needed her and one of her dads would let him in and she loved him and she was just there. He wishes he could do that now but he figures New York is a pretty long way away and she probably won't want to see him anyway.

_I bet you think I either moved on or hate you  
_'_Cause each time you reach out there's no reply  
__I bet it never, ever occurred to you that I can't say hello to you  
__And risk another goodbye_

Sometimes her phone rings and his handsome face flashes across her screen and she almost very nearly picks up the phone each time but she can't. She guesses he's responding to her calls where she rings but never says anything but she can't be sure because she never actually answers his calls. If it's anything really important, Kurt will tell her. He probably hates her but she knows she'll always love him no matter what he does, just because he's Finn and she increasing finds herself hating herself too, and really she doesn't blame him. She hates wearing sky-scraping heels that make her feet ache and covering her face in excessive amounts of make-up, causing her eyes to sting and pimples to break-out all over her once flawless skin; but she does it all to feel wanted and accepted and not completely and totally alone in this world. Finn was her everything, and when you lose your everything you're left with nothing... but she guesses nothing is what you make it. Nothing can be having superficial friends that only like you for your talent and appearance. Nothing can be Brody. Nothing can be going through life just feeling numb. And when her phone rings for probably the eleventh time she realises why she can't just pick up the phone and talk to him - she doesn't want to say goodbye to him again and suffer all that pain. She thinks she's said goodbye to him one-too-many times.

_And I just want to tell you  
__It takes everything in me not to call you  
__And I wish I could run to you  
__And I hope you know that  
__Every time I don't,  
__I almost do, I almost do_

Glee Club loses sectionals and he honestly feels like the biggest loser on the whole entire planet right now because he just keeps failing at absolutely anything - college, the army, honouring his father, doing Mr Schue proud and holding onto the love of his life and he swears the list could go on forever. He's in the biggest funk and he won't come out of his room for days and he knows his mum and Burt are probably worried sick about him because he barely even touches his food at meal times and he's just such a mess. He knows there's only one person who'll really be able to make this better and help him to start believing in himself once again but he fucked up his entire relationship with that one person so much that she won't even return his calls. He thinks she hates him and really, he gets it, since he's such a loser and all. Being him kinda sucks right now.

She hears Kurt talking to Blaine on the phone about New Directions losing sectionals and it honestly feels like a massive stab in the chest because everything they'd worked to achieve in the past three years had just been undone and she can only begin to imagine what Finn must be feeling right now. The thought of calling him races though her mind but she dismisses it straight away, he probably has someone else to hold his hand through this whole mess now anyway. Probably someone like Quinn who's blonde and tall and thin and super pretty and popular and everything else she's not. She sends up a prayer for him though, a silent cry of support for her everything that left her with nothing.

_We made quite a mess, babe  
__It's probably better off this way  
__And I confess, babe  
__That in my dreams you're touching my face  
__And asking me if I want to try again with you  
__And I almost do_

His dreams are filled with all the bad parts of his relationship with Rachel and he realises how much shit they've actually been through together and he's kind of impressed they've made it this far. After recalling all these memories he starts thinking that it's probably better for them to just keep their distance because at least they won't have to deal with their stupid mistakes and fall apart over and over again. But then the dreams of all the good times come and he sees how much they really need each other to like, live, because what he's doing right now sure as hell isn't living and if the tether he's been ignoring is right Rachel isn't exactly living either. He then finds himself in a cold shower because after the bad dreams and the sweet dreams he kind of got to the wet dreams and she wasn't really wearing anything and her hands were stroking his- he's enduring this cold shower for a reason, okay?

After he's finished y'know, cooling off, he punches the number he's memorised into his phone and prays to god that she'll just pick up even though it's probably the middle of the night and she should be sleeping.

_And I just want to tell you  
__It takes everything in me not to call you  
__And I wish I could run to you  
__And I hope you know that  
__Every time I don't,  
__I almost do, I almost do_

The harsh sound of her phone ringing drags her out of her blissful thoughts of her and Finn when things were good and she wonders who could be calling her at this hour of the night. Her breath hitches when her eyes scan the calling ID and she panics for a few seconds until she decides to finally answer the call and then the phone stops ringing and she mentally curses herself for being such an idiot. Immediately she grabs her phone and rings him back, impatiently waiting for him to pick up. While the phone connects and begins sending repetitive ringing noises down her ear she starts to question why she's doing this and comes to the conclusion that he's probably drunk or something or maybe she imagined his call and she's honestly about to give up when his rough voice echoes through her mind.

"R-Rachel, I..."

_I bet this time of night you're still up  
__I bet you're tired from a long, hard week  
__I bet you're sitting in your chair by the window, looking out at the city  
__And I hope sometimes you wonder about me_

"Hi"

He finishes after stuttering for quite some time, she tells him high back and they share a moment of silence before she speaks up again.

"You know, I've really missed you Finn"

"I've missed you too, Rach

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**Okay, so I've decided to turn this into a collection of one-shots since I'm going to be off school for the next two months with nothing much to do. And I guess my other installment paid off - I got top marks in my english exam! (yay) Reviews are very much appreciated and I'd like to take the time to thanks those who have reviewed - you're awesome and you deserve cookies.**

**Love, Sliguu**


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